Help! My child is not behaving himself!
Rude behavior in children is something that no parent can tolerate. It becomes especially harder to deal with since the offender is your own child. It can take on the form of refusing to do tasks to using rude or foul language.
Though misbehaving cannot be termed as being anti- social, however if given a blind eye, it can soon turn into a problem of greater magnitude.
Below we list effective ways in which you can help your child to improve towards more acceptable social behavior:
- Be careful of your actions:Children mirror adults. You need to be especially careful of your own behavior in front of your child. Make sure that you do not treat others uncouthly or with disrespect, talk ill of your job or colleagues in front of your child. If you are doing so, your child will pick up the same habits. You need to lead by setting good examples.
· Know who your child’s friends are:
It is good to know who your child spends time with in your absence. If not parents, children tend to pick up habits from friends. In case you do not approve of your child’s friends, do not get to aggressive about it. Only cool-headed dialogue & genuine concern will help you in explaining to your child how the company he keeps affects him/her.
· Try not to reprimand in front of others:
If your child is using rude words or behavior, try not to lecture him/her in the presence of others. This will only create more negativity & result in worse behavior. Instead, you could excuse yourself & the child, take a little walk & warn against such behavior in the future. Instilling confidence will make the child try to improve his/her behavior.
· Identify where the child is picking rude behavior:
You need to identify whether your child is picking up rude behavior by playing video games, watching violence on TV, visiting objectionable websites etc. In the same vein, you need to regulate access to such media.
· Do not be too moralistic:Sometimes, children do not try to hurt others intentionally. They might say something rude without realizing the affect on the other person. In such cases, it is advisable to first make sure that that is the case & then explain to your child gently. Being over moralistic & too harsh in such a case will only make your child aggressive.
- Introduce incentives & punishments in the programme:You & your child could agree upon terms wherein he/she will be rewarded or punished for good or bad behavior. Incentives are a great way to reward your child’s good behavior. Similarly, if your child is errant you could withhold or give smaller incentives.
Beyond anything, place faith & love your child. Trust him/her to make better individuals out of themselves.